Payal Johri The Countless Silent Whispers With Coffee, To Him! March 13, 2016

Shutting down my laptop, cleaning the stack of papers from my desk, and shoving them into my drawer, closing my notebook, and recapping my pen, I place them both into my bag along with the laptop. Taking out a post-it from the drawer, I jot down some reminders for myself and stick it on my desk, and finally get up to leave with a satisfactory smile on my face. Another day ends, grinding my mind off at the office. Finally time for some ‘Me-Time’, that’s what I like to call it.

Working in a city, away from the shower of mother’s love, care, and delectable food can be really difficult as well as lonesome at times. All one needs is some coffee, and food to satisfy the insatiable hunger at such times. I am not a very social person. In fact, all I have are colleagues and acquaintances. Mine, is a lonely life.

Fixed place with a fixed menu of dinner, and my fixed doze of caffeine, is what I look up to at the break of each day. The only thing different about these daily trips to the café is the people I sit around during this time. Each day I get to see a new face, hiding something beneath those hoodwinked expressions and a new pair of candour eyes, revealing all that the heart feels.

We never show who we are, and we never are what we show.

Amidst all these identically non-identical hordes of people that I come across, almost daily there is this one person, who just like me has a fixed place, fixed menu of dinner and a fixed expression glued to his face which gives out absolutely nothing.

He seems to be so resolved in himself that even his eyes don’t deceive him. His calm demeanour and the eased up grin leaves me envying him more than anything else. I feel a sudden constrain to know him deeper and better.

A quick exchange of looks followed by an impish smile and he exits the café, leaving me to long for the next evening to roll in. Each day before entering the café, I silently wished for him to be there for just one another day.

One look at him and my heart sighs a breath of relief. One warming smile from him and my heart sinks in the joy of ecstasy. One expression from him and my heart dances to the rhythm of its own beats. Such was the effect of his presence in the café and in my life.

My evenings are now spent studying that one person who had now become my silent friend. He too has noticed me looking at him, sometimes blankly and sometimes deep in thoughts. It’s as if, we’ve developed a bond in the past few days which pulls us together each time, our stare meets.

Our hearts speak the language of our eyes, and I know that it is the purest of the conversations ever, because eyes never lie.

We don’t know each other enough, but we know enough to let this silent conversation flow, and calm our inner turmoil. I don’t want anything more than this from him nor do I have any intention but he listens to me without a word being spoken.

I don’t know how long will I be able to see him, but I do know, that my loneliness has now been replaced by the countless conversations that we’ve had in the past few days. And I’m not alone, anymore.



Avatar for Payal Johri

Words that best describe me: insane, fun-loving, ambitious, wanderer, a believer. Nothing can stop me from achieving what I want, and optimism and a perfect cup of coffee is what keeps me going, in the long run. I am a chirpy, affectionate, extrovert girl with a knack for writing, and firmly believe in making a difference through my words. Read, write, sleep, repeat, is the only mantra that I ceremoniously like to follow.

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