Geetika Datta Dealing With Moving Out For The First Time July 22, 2015

Most of us have had to move away from home at some point of our lives, or another; be it for studies, work or after marriage. Moving can be tough. To have to uproot one’s whole life and get plonked into an alien land, with alien people, with the knowledge that this is your life now, can be intimidating and quite dispiriting. Sure, some people wait their whole lives to move out of their parents’ and live independently. Others, not so much.

And when it’s the first time doing so… Oh boy! It can be a complete roller-coaster ride. From adjustment issues with people around to missing the mouthwatering food cooked by your mom, everything can take a toll on your mental health. We get it. Change is hard. But inevitable too. So we’re here to help you make your big change of environment a little easier. Here’s how:

1. Deal with homesickness

Talk to your parents/family/loved ones regularly. It helps one feel content about the fact that though they aren’t in close proximity, they’re just a call away and always there for you.

But beware! Don’t make a habit of it, lest the calls become so frequent that you can’t go by a single hour without talking to them. If that becomes the case, you desperately need a distraction.

2. Make new friends

The only way to make the brand new, unfamiliar place feel welcoming is to forge new friendships. It is good to have people to talk to, share stories and problems with, people with whom you can explore the new place, and, of course, have fun with! Having friends helps pass the free time enjoyably and doesn’t give unwanted thoughts a chance to come to mind.

3. Befriend a variety of people

When you move into a PG or hostel, you are bound to find people in the same boat as you. So, befriend them and have a heart-to-heart. If you have moved after marriage, make friends with neighbours and people around. Also, find people who have been living there for a while, or are locals, so that they can show you around and teach you how to survive the place.

4. Learn to do your chores

It’s possible that you may never have lifted a finger to help your mother around the house, and now all of a sudden you’re having to take care of yourself, run errands, wash and iron your clothes, keep the place clean and tidy, and maybe even cook. It may come as a mild form of cultural shock to you, especially if you’ve left home right after school. But the sooner you get down and used to it all, the better. The more you delay, the worse you’ll feel. So start right away, and you’ll realize it gives you a sense of independence. Value it.

5. Occupy yourself with work/studies/other activities

Keep yourself busy. It acts as a distraction from whatever it is that’s bothering you, making you unhappy or is interfering with you adjusting to the new environment. Being engrossed in your work is a great way to get your mind off unpleasant thoughts. And if your distraction happens to be something you love doing, then it’s just a bonus! You’ll start liking your new life in no time!

6. Learn the local language

If you happen to have landed yourself in the foreign land or in a region where you’re not familiar with the local language, learn it ASAP. People tend to stick closer to those who speak the same tongue; it’s human nature and scientifically proven too. So waste no time in picking up at least a few common phrases and words and then gradually go on to learning the language enough to converse fluently with the locals. You’ll see, it makes life a heck of a lot easier. And hey! You learn a new language! You’re multilingual and everything.

7. Start enjoying

Sure, change can be daunting. Especially if it is of this kind and when it has been thrown at you all of a sudden. But at the end of the day it is up to you to make of it what you can. So start enjoying. Let go of all the insecurities and homesickness. Start having a good time, and life will get easier.

8. Suck it up!

Tried everything and nothing’s worked so far? Still want to curl up in bed and cry yourself to sleep. Self-pity taking over your mind like fog? Well, it’s time to forget about it all and just suck it up! Accept once and for all that this is what your life is going to be like from now on, at least for a while. And if it is for a while, be glad that all that’s bothering you will end some day. No one can come and fix things for you. It is YOUR life and you need to do what you can with it to be happy.

So just recognize that this is what the state of affairs is going to be and start living it to the fullest. Who knows, this might turn out to be the best time of your life!

Avatar for Geetika Datta

Scientific researcher in-the-making, but writing is what captures my heart. Highly opinionated one moment, freakishly diplomatic the very next. Jack of all trades, master of, well, at least some (I'd like to believe). Headstrong and an eleutheromaniac, I'm on the perpetual journey to self discovery.

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