A year into the relationship, having seen the best and worst of times, one believes by now they know whether they are in love with someone or this is just a milestone one has to cross before they meet ‘The One’.
‘The One’ who was specially made for them, strategically and intelligently designed to suit their needs, someone can who can easily blend into them and mold them thereafter into better individuals, towards a brighter tomorrow. One year into the relationship and I still cannot say for sure, that yes, I have found ‘The One’.
Do not get me wrong. It is not that I do not love him. Of course I do. It is not that I do not see a future with him. I do. It is not that he treats me differently. He doesn’t.
The two of us make the most compatible couple I have personally ever come across. When we are together, it is like the time around us stops. Suddenly it does not matter what is happening in the world and in our lives. All that matters is that we are together, with each other, breathing and laughing, as if the two are synonymous.
Then what is the confusion about? This continuous doodling of emotions in my head! Is it due to popular culture? Is it the countless romantic films, stories and poems I’ve grown up reading? Is it the idea of feeling incomplete without ‘that someone’? Is it the notion of needing someone that is causing this confusion in my head? That is making me doubt my own feelings?
Well in that case, no, I do not need him and it is not true, that I cannot live without him. For I can.
The truth is that I do not need him, I want him. It is not that I cannot live without him, but I do not want to live without him. The difference between need and want is intricate but important.
We need a job to survive. We do not necessarily want one. We need to eat healthy to maintain a healthy mind and body, we do not necessarily want to. We need to cover ourselves in clothes, we may not want to. Our needs are often forced onto us by nature and society. This should not be the case with our wants.
Love should not enchain you. It should set you free. Let love be flexible. Let it be a choice and not an infliction.
I want to have him in my life, even though I do not need him. He is not a forced necessity and he is definitely not my addiction. He is someone I choose. I choose to be with him every day. Choice, that’s the difference.